Saturday 17 September 2016

The So.Much.Guardian Twitter feed seems to have gone on holiday: this should help prevent withdrawal symptoms


Why not do us all a favour, George, and give up eating altogether?


Bit racist, Paddy!

(a) no it isn't (b) switch to tea.


I very much hope we never find out, Chitra.


She isn't. Any Top 50 male player for the past two decades would have crushed her 6-0, 6-0. 


Meanwhile, the rest of us will go on worrying about being slaughtered by Muslim terrorists.


Another cure would be not spending money you don't have.


I knew clitorises existed - but tulip emojis?


As opposed to greed, laziness, lack of self-control and too much money?


Lindy, you're preaching to the converted - all Guardian readers despise their country.


I SO MUCH DON'T GIVE A FLYING ONE!


No, don't. Pay for electrolysis, because a beard on a woman is utterly repulsive.


Yes, indeed - let's strive to maintain poverty, unemployment, addiction and violence!


What? That it doesn't taste very nice?


Melanin envy's a terrible affliction, Patrick MacOutreach.


Well, she is on her own, actually, Mariella - that's sort of the problem here.


But if Marc was hoping that not "seeing colour" would get him off the hook, he'd better think again:


Lose/lose situation, or what?


You're kidding, right?


I'm not sure the people of Venezuela - or any other socialist country - would agree, Rutger. Never mind, though - Ronan obviously would!


Nurse!


Because the EU exports far more to Britain than it imports. Read a simple economics textbook.  And while we're at it, are you seriously suggesting the EU's leaders aren't deluded?

I'll end with the sort of problem that only 21st century left-liberals would consider a genuine problem:


Come back, So.Much.Guardian - your country needs you! And even if it doesn't, I do.


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